Sunday, July 31, 2011

On the Precipice of the Move

Casa Bandera apartments in Las Cruces, New Mexico

As I realize how ridiculous I look laying on the floor scrubbing the carcasses of bed bugs off the baseboards of someone else's room, I had one of those moments were you wonder how the hell you got to this point. In the past two weeks I have been as happy as I have ever been and as low too. And now everything is up in the air. It is the last few hours I have in Las Cruces.

The past week in particular was a whirlwind of emotions. I slept very little. Perhaps that attributed to the feeling. In the past three days I have slept four hours. And I will not sleep tonight...

Soon I will be in El Paso and in a worse situation than I am in now. I do not want to live with my parents, even if it is only for a month. It is a hassle to live with five other people. I like my parents, but it is too much to worry about. I have to be quiet at night, much earlier than now, because they get up so early for work. And the house is incredibly hot. They do not have refrigerated air like I have had in my apartment for the last two years. Plus there is the fact that I am 26 years old. That is too old to live with your parents in my opinion.

Hopefully I will be in Portland in a month. What will happen there I do not know. I suspect it will be the same. People are the same everywhere. So my social life will probably stay as boring as now. But, hey, it is a beautiful city, especially compared to the dirt and rocks of El Paso. I can not wait to live in a place with trees. That alone is worth moving. And I get to be on my own again. I have to admit I am a bit worried about being so far away from home. When I am in Las Cruces I always have family an hour away to help with things like moving into and apartment and whatnot. Portland will be different. I do not know what I will have there.

Still, I can not wait to see what the future holds. (I am hoping it will be a lot less cleaning dead bed bugs off baseboards)
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Thursday, July 28, 2011


It is kind of funny, I've lived in Las Cruces on and off for eight years, yet, now that I am leaving, nobody seems to care. That isn't exactly true. Probably two people have made an effort to hang out with me in the last few months. I appreciate it. But it feels like all the different places I have worked, the supposed friends I've made, it should be a bigger deal. And when I leave El Paso in a month I am willing to bet only one person will care there too.

Perhaps I haven't been a good enough friend. I don't know. I try to be a good person and listen to people's problems and be there if anyone needs me. It seems like people enjoy having me around. Maybe I should have been more aggressively social. Maybe social networking sites allowed people to keep in touch with me and have no need to ever see me despite us living minutes away from one another. Whatever the reason, I know when I leave I will not miss this place. There are things I like about Las Cruces (the NMSU campus, Mesilla, the mountains) and El Paso (downtown, my parents' house, the Plaza Classic Film Festival), but I will not miss those things.

The last nearly decade of my life seems like I wasted it and that is why nobody cares here. No matter though. I am moving to Portland. And I feel I will be happy enough to make up for what I did not do here. I am not sad at all about this. Disappointed in the way it is winding down, but if I am not good enough for the people here it is their loss. Ha! Not really.

It is just best for me to get out of here quickly before I bore myself to death.
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Friday, July 15, 2011

The 1977 NBA All-Star Game

I just finished watching the 1977 NBA All-Star Game played in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. No, this is not a blog post written in February of 1977 and left in an internet time capsule, only to be uncovered in 2011; NBA-TV showed the game tonight as one of their Greatest Games series. My favorite thing about having NBA-TV (and NFL Network too) is being able to see classic games. I have been reading about these guys for my whole life, but I have not seen too many of their games.

What impressed me the most, and does every single time I see him play, was Julius Erving. Nobody could slow him down. Those gigantic hands control the ball effortlessly; he can go up for a dunk right off the bounce without warning because he can grip it so easily, no gathering required. He has this long stride that allows him to cover long stretches of court and jump from further out than it seemed everyone was used to. And even though this was an All-Star game, not traditionally known to be super competitive events in any professional sport, he played with a lot of hustle.