Skip to main content

Why Does This Girl Hate Me So Much?

Commercials are supposed to make you want to buy something, but I find myself tuning them out. Sometimes I will see a commercial on tv dozens of times before I finally notice for whom the ad is. And increasingly I discover myself not being swayed to buy something, but rather, to not buy something. Basically, if I think your commercial sucks, or it annoys me, I am not buying what you are selling.

And here is the newest ad that just makes me not want to buy this stuff ever. This is supposed to be "The Girlfriend," the perfect girl. Yet everything she says is the opposite of what I would want a girl to be like.

Let's take this point by point:
  1. She likes guys who have "a little fat." Damn! I don't have any. But that isn't a big deal right? She could learn to get over by lack of fat.
  2. She likes guys who have "a little bit hairy back." Damn again! I don't have a hairy back. Strike two for me. At this point I must disgust her...
  3. She likes guys who watch a lot of football. Finally! I love to watch football. But unfortunately for me I "have a job" and miss nearly all of them. I still get points for having an intention to watch a lot of football though I think.
  4. Going out with the boys. Nope. Don't do that. I really don't like hanging out with guys too much. I mean I talk to guys at work or whatever, but aside from the occasional pick up basketball game I am not "going out with the boys." Dudes are kind of disgusting (they are all fat and hairy).
  5. Going to the "striptease." I am pretty sure she means a strip club. And damn! I have never been to one of those, am not interested, and do not plan on going in the future. Strip clubs seem a little sleazy to me. And if this very attractive (and don't get me wrong, I do think she is attractive) lady is your girlfriend couldn't you just have her strip for you? I don't want to judge a book by its cover, but she does not seem like she would have a problem with that. And, again having never been to one I am not entirely sure, you aren't really allowed to have sex with the strippers, right? Another advantage to having your hot girlfriend do it. Maybe? Oh well, that was a stupid thought.
Also, I am not really into her accent. I know a lot of people (women included) are into people with accents, but hers is just annoying. Anyway I guess since this girl would hate me I can't buy Jim Beam. Sorry Jim Beam.


Popular posts from this blog

Philippines Vacation: Day Five

After a day of exploring the area near Doljo Beach where we were staying and meeting a strange man, we decided to book a tour of the Chocolate Hills of Bohol. Sadly, a horrible earthquake had caused a great deal of damage. Hundreds of people died and many buildings were demolished, including multiple famous churches. The strongest part of the earthquake happened very close to the Chocolate Hills. For months, we had been monitoring the safety of the island and almost considered changing our plans for the entire country, but we decided to go anyway. In November, following the big typhoon, another earthquake occurred...

Philippines Vacation: Day Two

The next day, we woke up and went to the restaurant at our "hotel" for breakfast. It took some time to get it, but while we waited, we chatted up the staff and some of the other travelers. We were given ube to eat before our food arrived. Ube is a purple root that tastes great by itself. I loved it.

Cambodia Vacation, Part Four: Angkor Wat and More

On the morning of my last day in Siem Reap, I got up super early. I was finally going to see one of the most famous places in the world, Angkor Wat. Outside of my hotel, there were tuk tuk drivers waiting to take anyone to the sites. I basically went with the one who was the least pushy. For a pretty low price, he offered to take me around for the day. I wouldn't say he was a tour guide, but he set the itinerary and then would leave me at each place for as long as I wanted to stay.

Because my time was limited, I wanted to get through all the best places as quickly as possible. My flight left in the evening that day, so I needed to get back to get my stuff at the hotel and then get to the airport. While I would have liked to spend more time, maybe bike around on my own, now I just have a reason to visit again in the next few years!

You have to pay for a day pass before entering. It is all clearly marked and easy to do. They take your picture and put it on the pass. At various plac…